SBG 118: Barbie
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Hi #Barbie! Welcome back to Lez Hang Out, the podcast that’s full of L- Leigh! E- Ellie! Z- Zeal! This week, Leigh (@lshfoster) and Ellie (@elliebrigida) finally get a chance to dish about the 4000 reasons why Greta Gerwig’s hit 2023 film Barbie Should’ve Been Gay.
From the second she steps onto the screen in all of her pink glory, Margot Robbie’s Barbie is giving gay. There were so many choices made for this film and every single one of them screams homosexual. The biggest choice being her glaringly obvious disinterest in any Ken ever. Not only does she not like-like any of the Kens, she doesn’t even seem to register that they are interested in her! Barbie is so taken aback by Ken’s desire to spend the night at her Dream House because they are “boyfriend/girlfriend” that she immediately spirals into an existential crisis that creates a rift in the fabric of the universe.
Everything from this moment on is Barbie’s coming out journey as she awakens from the fog of heteronormativity. She is given a choice, to stay in the closet or to take the Birkenstock and have her eyes opened to the Real World. If you have a heterosexual explanation for this choice, we would honestly love to hear it. We follow Barbie’s journey into the Real World where she encounters more disappointing men and narrowly escapes being put back into the closet (the Barbie Box) by Mattel with the help of Gloria. As soon as these two are onscreen together, it becomes impossible not to ship them. Let #Glorbie kiss, you cowards!
While Glorbie are off shining, Ken is making it literally the entire world’s problem that the girl he likes doesn’t like him back. This is somehow enough justification for him and the other Kens to brainwash all of the Barbies in Barbie Land, overthrow the all-women government, and steal every Dream House. It is a bit outrageous how much screen time Ken and other male characters are given in a movie called Barbie. Even at the end when the Barbies take Barbie Land back from the grips of the patriarchy, Ken still doesn’t quite get it through his head that Barbie and him are not going to be a couple. Barbie on the other hand has never felt more clearly about who she is and who she no longer can pretend to be. She is simply too gay to go back to her old heteronormative life in Barbie Land; and she has to leave that world behind to embrace her new life with Gloria and their daughter.
We know one thing for sure, Barbie Should’ve Been Gay.
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